A Captain and His Crew

 

 

 

I happened to catch this picture running through a song on YouTube. I saw it briefly but I will never forget it.  A brief second and I saw myself. It was me! It was also any woman who is letting God guide her!

 

 

 

No it's not really me, but it may as well be. If my words couldn't get you to picture what I'm going through then this picture should. Life's boat tilts and the waves crash but Jesus has his hand on my shoulder and points me in the direction I should go. If I become fearful and look to either side at the large waves (trials) trying to consume us, I start to go overboard into the deep abyss.

 

Call me crazy, but as we go through challenges I find myself somewhat grateful. What I experience can in turn be used to help others deal with similar situations.

 

During cell group this week we were asked to be silent and let God speak to us an encouraging word for another member. What someone shared with me left me almost speechless. She mentioned Isaiah 41 and as she wasn’t sure of the words verbatim but she knew the context. I felt truly refreshed because when I sat down to read the chapter I could apply this to my life and what I witness around me.

 

 

"The poor and needy seek water, but there is none,
Their tongues fail for thirst.
I, the Lord, will hear them;
I, the God of Israel, will not forsake them.
¹⁸ I will open rivers in desolate heights,
And fountains in the midst of the valleys;
I will make the wilderness a pool of water,
And the dry land springs of water.
¹⁹ I will plant in the wilderness the cedar and the acacia tree,
The myrtle and the oil tree;
I will set in the desert the cypress tree and the pine
And the box tree together,
²⁰ That they may see and know,
And consider and understand together,
That the hand of the Lord has done this,
And the Holy One of Israel has created it.

 

I’m going backwards here but this screams “Japan” and any other secular nation to me. God is the only one who can pull them out of their darkness. I pray this prayer for them but not as eloquently. I saw something else too.

 

9 You whom I have taken from the ends of the earth,
And called from its farthest regions,
And said to you,
‘You are My servant,
I have chosen you and have not cast you away:
10 Fear not, for I am with you;
Be not dismayed, for I am your God.
I will strengthen you,
Yes, I will help you,
I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.'

God is telling me to fear not. Once I thought I wasn’t good enough for missions, I mis-judged it. I mis-judged myself, I lacked trust in God. If you are struggling with direction in your life, give it to Jesus. Be silent and let him speak to you. Pray that the things which are not of him and his grace will be banished from your mind.

 

Lord, I pray that you give me Jesus more and more. Fill my soul with his spirit, allow me to breath his words and give his comfort. Let me be silent when I need to be and bold with his message when the opportunity arises. Allow others to see Jesus in the storms. - Amen

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Appreciating the past........

Disclaimer: While God is faithful and has spiritually matured me, I'm still human, I have emotions. He has never left my side and what you read about in my blog reflects my raw feelings and has already been discussed with the only one who can truly carrying me through it. I don't want anyone to get the impression that just because I've gone off to be a missionary that I'm super-human, because I'm not.

Lately, when I'm homesick I close my eyes and picture a place that brought me great memories. The image of my grandparent's living room shows up and if I focus enough I can see my grandma reading the morning paper and my grandpa cooking breakfast. I can smell the comforting aroma of coffee and fresh vegetables. I can picture the back window shades open with the morning sun beaming towards the kitchen table. The dark colored wood kitchen table, the pink recliners, white couch, grandma's high school basketball sitting on top of the book shelf and the sound of the deer bell by the door with their last name engraved.

I miss them a lot. 

They did a lot for my sisters and I growing up. They prayed for us, made us sit through Bible studies (which I dreaded at a young age) took us to church, took us on long road trips to Tennessee & Kentucky and short ones to Mangum & Altus. (Go figure! Altus became a major part of my life). They taught me about history and how to appreciate it. Their wisdom of music taught me to appreciate what music has majorly been forgotten.

These are things I never want to take for granted!

Things that I miss                                                                                                      
1) Family & Friends                                                                                                    
2)  Driving                                                                                                                  
3) Cracker Barrel                                                                                                        
4) Shoes that fit                                                                                                        
5) Cheaper food (this doesn't mean junk food)                                               
6) Natural landscapes and wide open spaces  (I have a bias for American scenery)      

Things I Enjoy in Japan
1) Meeting people from all over the world
2) Being so different that it strikes people's curiosity as to why I'm here
3) Visiting places I had only heard about or seen on the news
4) Slowly becoming bi-lingual (I emphasis the slowly)
5) My change in comfort-levels
6) Exercise becoming a way of life, not an event
7) Feeling safe while walking down a dark alley at night by myself

I miss my dog, Minnie Pearl

 

 

When I allow myself to think about it, the uncertainty of when I will place my feet on American soil makes the homesickness stronger.  I know it will never go away.  However, I am indulging in the experiences available here. I know full and well I'm where God wants me. His peace still surrounds me. I pray everyday that his will and not mine is done. I pray that Japan sees him through me. I pray that this is seen as about him and not myself. I pray that I become more humble and lenient on God more than ever.

 

 

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Goodbye America, Hello Japan

 

About two hours after this photo was taken we were on the runway taking off the coast of California. As the plane lifted off the soil of America a wave of emotions came over me and I quietly cried. My daughter was watching me, as she always does when we are taking off because it drives her nuts how quiet and still I become. This time instead of saying "Mommy, open your eyes." She said "Daddy, mommy is crying." I told them it was nothing. I wanted to grieve my loss of what was familiar for a brief moment by myself. Then I wanted to breath and look forward to what God has in store for our lives and the lives of the Japanese people.

 

The plane flight was extremely peaceful. I know God did that! I got to sleep more than before, even with a bunch of rowdy Latter Day Saints having a great time in the row ahead of me. It made me happy that they were so happy.

 

So this time we found a legit sign that we can take a photo in front of! When we came to customs and immigration I felt truly like a foreigner when we were taken in to a small, brightly lit room in which a very nice Japanese man questioned us on why we were going to be in Japan so long and if we had the funds in which to survive upon. Then he left and came back a few times and within those nerve racking minutes I did think "Please let us in!"

 

 

Even during our jet lag we celebrated Emmy's birthday the next day two days by taking a trip to Machida and letting her play in the arcade and stopping by the Disney Store. We have gotten over the jet lag at this point and are staying at the mission housing above the church. We're becoming familiar with our neighborhood and getting acquainted with the ministry team here as well.

 

During this time Will and I are applying for jobs in order to obtain a working visa. I've had one interview and another scheduled for later this week. Our prayer is that God will provide one of us with a job in order for the other to go to language school. Eventually we would switch places. We are experiencing the definite realization that this is all in God's timing and we are trying to keep busy with his work and teaching an afternoon English class for children. Though it is hot and humid, we are extremely blessed to be able to live abroad, to have able bodies in which to get around, and sound minds in which to learn a difficult language. God bless everyone and thank you for your prayers!

One version of a train station map

Emmy enjoying the height of the water fountain!

We found a Buddhist temple while on a morning walk. I prayed over it that it would release its grip of the Japanese people.

Playing Uno with some of our English class

Will leading the activity during English class

 

Missionary Training

We left our friend's home in Edmond in the wee hours of the morning (just how I love to begin a trip.) While everyone was sleeping soundly and I was navigating through rural Kansas I had time to waste about what to expect at Missionary Training International. I was praying intensely that Emmaly, who is taking the random moves hardest would be able to meet other kids who are going through the same changes she is. This prayer was answered and the children's program gave more insight and comfort than a mother could ever ask for.

The first two weeks were centered on learning language acquisition techniques. The staff was amazing. Two of the teachers were Dwight and Barbara who have an amazing story of living in Vietnam during the war while ministering to the Jeh. I loved that they encouraged us to look at language learning from a "Yet" standpoint. Thinking about learning the Japanese language and their (3) writing systems seemed like it wouldn't be possible, now I say "I haven't learned it yet."

The last two weeks were spent opening up "raw" emotions. We learned our conflict style, stress levels and how to say healthy goodbyes.

In regards to stress, we were put into a simulation where we were hiding from "rebels" and had to make hard decisions, while not knowing what was going to happen next. I tried to mentally put aside the fact that this was practice, so I began to deal with it as if it were real. Ironically I thought I would start stressing out quickly, but my heart beat was normal, it was hot and I begin to pray. It allowed God's peace to come over me. When the "armed" rebels finally found us I immediately thought back to the time when I was 16 and was robbed at gunpoint. I handled it then, I'll handle it now. Afterwards, I begin to think about what really does stress me out and why wasn't I stressed in that situation. I think it's time to lighten up on the non-essentials and Exit my world and Enter the world of whomever I come across.

I'm a lion, Will is a fox, according to our conflict styles. A lion is direct and task-oriented, the fox is a compromiser, who gives a little and takes a little. It made so much sense once this information was allowed to sink in. There are good things about both, but it's the negative aspects of our styles that we want to work on.

Lord, I didn't know I was so intimidating to people! But this is something I'm aware of now and plan to work on.

The hardest part of the whole program was allowing my feelings and emotions to surface exposing my vulnerability. We learned what healthy goodbyes were and how to give those we leave behind to the Lord. It's a common misconception that missionaries are running out into this grand adventure and not missing anything back home. We feel torn and even replaced when we leave. I'm personally burdened by the fact that a "goodbye" might be final on this side of Heaven.

In between classes, we made incredible relationships, can't you tell! We also played many card games, Mafia (new favorite), couch jumped, ran a 5k and experienced strengthening growth groups.

 

We've made life long friends and were able to feel as a family with people we had never met. Knowing that there are others who feel as you feel and are going forward as you are make the unknown seem less intimidating.

The kids in class with us learning about the transitional chaos and re-settling process.

Kickball!

Change is good for some things............

It's been awhile since I've blogged but I actually have a few spare moments to type. Lately of course it's been studying, studying, studying and homeschooling. As well as trying to fit tid bits of common sense and realization into my life. For one I'm turning into a health nut persay.  I'm taking it upon myself to add more education into my mind about what is in the American food system, who runs it and why they want a "FAT NATION." My eyes have been opened recently to the benefits of exercise, which I used to despise. Now I feel as if I want to go....go.....goooooooooo! I have taken it upon myself to naturally heal my own thyroid with the help of God.  I'm actually beginning to wonder if there was a problem in the first place and not just a money maker for the doctor to prescribe medication.
I don't feel so sluggish anymore, because I'm really watching what I eat and what goes into it. As well as exercise (that old dirty word.) Over a month and half ago I began "Insanity" which apparently is a part of the P 90X family and I got my lazy bottom up and started exercising, heaving and gasping for breath! But now, as I continue it I feel my body changing, it doesn't get tired like it did. It craves the exercise. I'm not striving for a number on a scale but just to feel healthy! I'm also changing little things in my eating style. First, I'm not going to get on any diets! It's a bad word and usually unsuccessful because you always "stop a diet." I really encourage just slowly changing eating patterns and grocery store trips.
If you think eating healthy is expensive take a look at this from a different perspective...

                                         

 

Don't fool yourself into thinking that cancer is only genetic! Can you read the labels on your food? What are all those various long words and why is there corn syrup in almost everything? Look up what super foods are! Green tea is one of my favorites! I make it hot and pour it over ice, no sugar needed! Also I try to fit Kale into different meals, eggs, sandwiches, salad.  Blueberries are my favorite! They are a great source of antioxidants. I add them to yogurt for a post work-out treat! Salmon (if you are a fish person) is a healthy fat. It's good for your brain, heart and skin! Cook with olive oil not vegetable oil!

 Drink more water! Warning: The USDA is trying to approve a genetically modified salmon! Splurge for the wild-caught! Watch packaging, Walmart sells so-called "Wild-caught" Salmon but the back lists that they are farm raised in China.

This venture into eating as many non-processed foods as possible began with an idea last year after we went to Japan. The Japanese try very hard to keeps gmos out of their food. There is a reason Japan is one of the healthiest countries in the world! I thought this, "If my family and I continue to eat processed American food with little amounts of fresh vegetables (a big thing in Japan) fruit (expensive in Japan but accessible) and fish (everywhere in Japan!) then we are going to feel as if we are starving if we don't start to change now!"

You may think that sounds silly, but I was there! When you haven't the background of home-cooking from scratch expect what you've taught yourself it can be a challenge to come up with meals to eat in a foreign land. Thankfully I've purchased a Japanese cookbook that actually babysteps me through a Japanese grocery store.

I'm not a nutritionist nor expert by no means on exercise or healthy eating, but you don't have to be! This is common sense. I'm not through.......my rant and information will continue after I charge my computer one day........

What we have been up to

 As most of you know we've moved out of our apartment and are staying with friends for a short while. The last few days in the apartment were emotional for me because I was coming to terms that we were about to give up my "2nd child" the dog. If you've ever had a dog or animal that you loved like family and knew each other's schedules and little quirks then you will understand. After much prayer and thought into who we would allow to take her, the Lord gave me my answer. I had mentioned to my dad (who I'd thought wouldn't be interested) that I was still having a difficult time figuring this situation out. He left the room, made a call and came back and said he'd take her. God is so good!

Snuggling with Minnie like always

Since this post isn't going to be very long I'm going to leave you with some photos of what I've accomplished recently. The photo is of what I was able to dwindle down my room and Emmaly's room to.

 

 

 

 

 

One last thing, we are currently working on building a website for our life as missionaries in Japan. We will eventually begin blogging from there. There are only so many hours in the day and preparing our documents, plus educating ourselves takes alot of our time right now. Please continue to keep us in your prayers, especially that God is glorified through our efforts to share the gospel with the nation of Japan.

 

 

 

 

 

 



Oh the places you'll go...............

I knew when I was young I wouldn't stay in Oklahoma my whole life. It's a grand state, affordable and proud but I've seen most of what there is to see in Oklahoma, I'd like to venture out. We only live once. God made every inch of earth, he painted it different and raised the land higher in some places and flat in others. I've even traveled with my child in tow by myself to visit family and explore unknown territory. Nothing scary about it. I love that my child is already a world traveler at the age of 8. She's been to three countries (she counts America). I could only dream when I was her age to be able to cross the ocean. When I was little I would rip the travel brochure request sheet out of my mom's magazines and send off for all types of brochures. I bet the mail carrier didn't know what hit him. Ha!

 

 

As we get ready to head to Japan, the urge to explore has become greater. I plan on preparing myself to climb Mt. Fuji next year. Additionally, I'm going to see what I can do to work in a rice field once in my life, hoping while I experience it to be a blessing to the others. We may even get to see the Cherry Blossoms in bloom finally.

It's been almost a week since we've moved out of the apartment and began our current state in life as vagabonds. I feel a little lost, not in my position where God wants me to be, only in my earthly standards. (ex. having my own kitchen, home, missing my dog). However, I'm thankful for what I do have. I have my little family and a few suitcases. Our friends have provided us with comfortable beds, a warm shelter and tummy pleasing food. I'm forever grateful.

 And having food and clothing, with these we shall be content. - 1 Timothy 6:8 (NKJV)

I sort of expect the next 6-7 months to fly by. While homeschooling Emmaly, Will and I are taking an online course to receive a certification to teach English as a second language. On Sundays we will began a class in Perspectives (see following link) www.perspectives.org .
We will be traveling to Colorado in May to attend a month long school for missionary families in order to prepare us culturally. Once back we will finish final preparations and shipments to Japan, then it will be onto the land of the rising sun. No really! The sun came up before 4am. Finally, please be in prayer for me as I'm praying about offering a class to women while we are in Japan. I want the focus study to be on the Proverbs 31 woman and then branch outward into what God expects of a woman. Despite the language barrier and cultural differences I believe the Lord has placed this particular subject on my heart to teach. God bless and have a beautiful Sunday morning!